YOUR DAILY DUMBASS(ES)

A nonprofit called In Defense of Animals just put out this list of experiments the government funded last year. They do it to expose the spending on animal testing. And, yes, testing on animals can be bad.

Although a few of these experiments sound AWESOME. We’re gonna focus on those. Here are some of the things the government paid to test in 2011 . . .

Hunger Versus Sex. Scientists got a grant to put hamsters on a diet and see how hungry they’d have to be before they chose food over sex. The answer was, with about 75% less food, they started focusing on eating over humping.

Lemon Causes Arousal? Researchers in Wisconsin got a grant for a test where they pumped in a lemon scent while male monkeys HAD SEX. Then they pumped lemon scent when the monkeys weren’t having sex. They got erections.

Cocaine Makes Jazz Better. Scientists found that rats preferred silence to music. But when they gave them COCAINE, the rats really, really liked MILES DAVIS. This, by the way, is the kind of research that makes America great.

(IDA USA)